Blogging's not the most productive thing I've ever done, but it does mean I can post my 'real thoughts' on Facebook without incurring an arbitrary ban for saying the following words: Methotrexate Drug Deal Twat Poof Africa Korea Hate Hitler Swastika Thatcher Zuck's bots are capricious little shits. O YEZ!

  Daniel Stack took the bud from his ear and placed it on the table in front of him. At 54, Daniel once again began to wonder what he was for? These feels had become increasingly frequent as of late. He’d left an online message with the health centre, and hoped they might reply soon. Perhaps he was responsible for feeling this way? His playlist shuffle had led Ladbaby’s Sausage Rolls neatly segueing into Wagner’s Götterdämmerung, and he couldn’t help feeling that the smooth transition only really occured in his own fucked-up existence, and that the worn plywood table in front of him was now suffering for his sins. What was he really for? Now. At this very moment? Daniel Stack was no longer a husband, barely a father, an unemployed & unemployable sales rep, and as he understood it - a complete drain on the Earth’s finite resources. He heard his toast eject from its Russell Hobbs nichrome-alloyed, oxide-resistant, electronic gadget, and wondered if the smell of burnt bread was ...

  We all love a bit of polarised division! When we open a fridge door at Xmas, we don’t say to ourselves: “Which of these nutritious vegetables should I sate my hunger with?” We say: “Meat or Cheese?” Everyone in the Waveney Valley border-region supports either OTBC FC or Ipshit. (There’s one or two Man Utd supporters, but that’s how modern liberal democracy works. With the illusion of ‘Choice’). Most folk around here will claim to “Always vote Tory”, but when push comes to shove the electorate are primarily Maxes or Commonests . So I got to thinking about how we could close the binary division over 'whether or not we should put our weakest at risk and our NHS under strain', with a more nuanced approach to our civil liberty, our right to celebrate, our rescue of the independent hospitality industry, and our overall feeling of being preached-to by the ‘Nanny State’? (Quick Heads Up: Spoons, Dominos and Morrisons Cafe’ will still be here in 2022, even if our local pubs and caf...

  As the year of World Football Ignores Slavery & Oppression (Once Again) 2022 creeps up upon us, and like smacked-out ostriches on a beach made of astro-turf we run back to our wholesale suppliers of unsustainability for guidance & a quick timecheck, our 'social media scrolls of acceptance' are sure to be filled with shrieks of horror, as for the 35th year in a row our Xmas gift confectionery displays are hastily replaced with Easter egg confectionery displays. As a regular attendee at Roman Catholic primary schools, I was always quite surprised and slightly amazed that Baby Jesus managed to get so much done in such a short space of time. The birth, the epiphany, the slaughter of the first-born, the carpentry, the Lads' Tour, the time in the desert, the betrayal, and then the hot cross bun & egg incident. All in four months. As a chocolate salesman in the 90s I later learned that supermarkets had nothing to do with Christian Festival timings, and like us - wer...