Send Her Victorious, HAPPY and Glorious.............. (PART 1)
*****Look away now if you love HM the Queen, because she reminds you of your nan or your mum, and you want her to live forever, regardless of what condition she may be in.*******
He does.
Hear Ye! Hear Ye!
So…. as you all know by now, I’m the Unofficial Town Crier for Olde Beccles, Wymondham and parts of Kenninghall.
There is very little expected of me, and enormous pressure on me to shout stuff.
Traditionally, in days of olden, the Town Crier would announce things of importance to the town, mainly concerning royal diktat, royal births, royal deaths, or executions (royal or otherwise).
So……. with Her Madge’s Jubbly already gone (Feb 6th), and a 4 Day Bank Holiday planned for June, it would be remiss of me NOT TO put out a massive shout to the old girl! 😄
But first a request:
Can we give her a break now?
Let her retire gracefully?
Take the pressure off a bit?
Imagine if YOU woke up with all that expectation on your shoulders?
I know she was born into it, but even she didn’t envisage being Queen, especially for 150 years!
She wasn’t even divinely appointed.
She was anointed, and only then because her uncle shagged a Catholic.
Her great great great great great grandad (twice removed, once beheaded) actually fell out with Parliament over ‘Divine Right’.
But we still insist she heads up the Non Catholic high & low churches of England, Scotland, Welsh Wales, and loyalist enclaves in small parts of Northern Ireland!
It’s a tough gig.
She had no chance of going to college and developing an interest in B/Tec Marine Biology or City&Guilds Beauty Therapy.
She couldn’t go to discos, cop-off and get titted-up by a local lad.
From the moment her dad took the throne & took us to war, she was always going to be monarch.
No chance of getting a job at Woolies, saving for a deposit on a mortgaged ‘home’, crapping in a portaloo at Glastonbury, or having a cheeky Nandos.
She was still going to be our monarch.
Taking one for the team.
And the Empire.
And the Commonwealth.
And 1/5th of the planet’s surface.
And I'd go as far as to say she's 'Job Done'!
Knackered.
So.......... With that in mind........ Can we NOT say or sing ‘God Save The Queen' anymore please?
If she’s ready, can she just get on with a normal-ish life now?
Or meet her maker & anointer in a more relaxed and pain-free way?
For her sake?
What if she’d like to bow out now?
(Or curtsy?)
God knows she’s put up with enough. 😢
She’s due a break.
Let her have a well-deserved rest.
Poor old sod.
We can still say "God Save Katie Price" tho’. Or the Beckhams. Thank you for reading.
Oyez! Oyez! Oyez!


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